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How To Build Self-Confidence And Power Into A Meaningful Life

Do you need to build self-confidence? How would you like to feel better about yourself and improve your social life?

Self-confidence is crucial for achieving personal growth and success. Your confidence and self-esteem are the foundation for building a successful and fulfilling life. Creating self-confidence will equip you with the ability to face challenges, take risks, and achieve your goals.

Furthermore, if you’re ready for a self-image upgrade, we have the answers you may be looking for!

This post may contain affiliate links, meaning I’ll receive a commission if you purchase through my link at no extra cost to you. Please read the full disclosure for more information.

Can You Become the Person You Want to Be?

We’ve all known that person who’s never afraid to raise their hand in class, speak up in a crowd, or be the first to volunteer! The self-assured co-worker who gets the promotion or the friend who’s both a career professional and PTA president year after year.

That one person who always knows what to do. The one we’ve all wanted to be.

It’s well understood that assertive, confident people go further in life than those who hide in the shadows. The go-getters are the ones willing to take risks and put themselves out there. Thus, they keep moving forward in life, are highly admired, and are taken more seriously.

Would you like to know how to feel capable enough to move forward too?

Actually, you can! Keep reading to learn how.

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A Self-Confidence Factor Quiz

First, we’ll determine your confidence level and the type of effort required for you to build self-confidence.

Let’s take a little quiz to find out.

For each of the questions below, rate yourself on a scale of 0 to 10, according to your opinion. Zero is no worth, and 10 is a perfect score. At the end of the quiz, tally up the sum of your answers for the final score.

A result of 42-50 is a healthy level of confidence. Decidedly, this high score means you may not find this article helpful.

If your score is a mid-range 21-41, your self-esteem could use some improvement. And we can help.

Consequently, I suggest contacting a counseling professional if your score is 20 or less, as the information in this article may not be sufficient to address your needs.

And now, are you ready to learn your self-confidence factor? Let’s go!

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Boost Self-Confidence Quiz

The Self-Confidence Quiz Factor:

Build Self-Esteem Quiz Question 1
Build Self Confidence Quiz Question 2
Build Self Esteem Quiz Question 3
Build Self-Esteem Quiz Question 4
Raise Self-Esteem Quiz Question 5

Now that you know the level of your need, let’s work together to help you build your confidence.

Signs and Symptoms of Low Confidence and Self-Esteem

You likely struggle with poor confidence and self-esteem if you’re still with me. Let’s take a look at the factors below that you see in yourself. This lets you know what areas you need to work on.

  1. Self-critical
  2. Unable to see positive qualities in yourself
  3. Frequent unfavorable self-comparison to others
  4. Consistently putting yourself down
  5. Self-blame when things go wrong, even when the cause is beyond your control
  6. Inability to accept or believe compliments from others
  7. Self-doubt
  8. Give in to others too easily. Unable to stand your ground
  9. Overly sensitive to criticism
  10. Social awkwardness
  11. Refusing to step outside your comfort zone or move forward due to fear of failure

The Reality of Low Self-Esteem

Those with a low self-image often have an imbalanced and unrealistic self-view. A person with poor self-confidence will doubt his or her self-worth and abilities. As a result, this individual simply feels they have nothing of worth to contribute to others.

These feelings of low self-confidence often lead to social and physical awkwardness, affecting relationships and participation in activities. Furthermore, decision-making and judgment are impaired due to the person’s skewed vision of themselves.

Feelings of social awkwardness can even cause others to avoid you as they sense your self-discomfort and are unsure how to deal with it.

Why Is It So Hard to Build Self-Confidence?

Building self-confidence is a gradual process that’s difficult for several reasons. A few examples include:

  1. Negative self-talk: It’s hard to feel confident when we constantly criticize ourselves and only focus on our flaws. For example, when someone often tells themselves they’re not good enough, they eventually come to believe it. Hence, the negative mindset is birthed.
  2. Past experiences: Past experiences can shape our beliefs about ourselves and our abilities. For instance, if someone failed at a task in the past, they may struggle to feel confident in their ability to succeed in the future.
  3. Comparison to others: When we compare ourselves to others, it creates a roadblock in feeling confident about our own abilities.
  4. Fear of failure: Overwhelming fear of failure can hold us back and make it hard to feel confident. A person who resolutely fears failure will likely avoid trying new experiences and taking risks. Failure to push through one’s fear limits opportunities to build self-confidence.

Building self-confidence requires a shift in mindset and a willingness to challenge negative beliefs about ourselves. It takes time and effort to bring about. Hence, many give up before they are successful in bringing about change. But with time and practice, we can learn to believe in ourselves and our abilities.

Boost your self-esteem

Poor Self-Esteem-Where It Begins

Social media plays a big role in feeling left behind. And with the explosion of online bullying and people who post only the best parts of their lives, it’s no wonder many social media users feel lacking or inferior.

But keep in mind that you’re only seeing a very small part of the story. Not many people will post about their child making a failing grade, getting in a fight with other kids, or being in trouble at work or school.

No one will mention a recent demotion at work when putting that sexy bikini photo out there.

Of course, the root causes of low self-esteem often start during our younger years.

This 2017 scientific study states adolescent students involved in the research had depression and anxiety levels of 19.4%. Furthermore, the study revealed a correlation between feelings of inadequacy and a lower quality of life

In addition, research identifies the issues below in regard to low self-esteem:

Root Causes of Low Self-Esteem Beginning in Childhood

  • Childhood trauma or abuse
  • Stigmatization or Discrimination, feeling of failure with fitting in or being able to conform, being different
  • A drastic life change
  • major loss
  • A drastic life change
  • Overly critical parents or other important adults
  • Emotionally absent parents of or other important adults
  • Poor performance in school
  • Bullying
  • Poor body image
  • Peer pressure, rejection by classmates/friends
  • Poverty
  • Perfectionism

Medical News Today has more on this issue if you’re interested.

So, now that you have some idea of where your low self-esteem comes from, it’s time to build self-confidence and power your life forward!

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Improve Self-Confidence For A Better Life

Remember, you’ve spent months, even years, building negative and limiting self-beliefs, and it will take time to tear down those old cracked walls and build new solid ones. Building your confidence means changing damaging thought patterns and behaviors. But do realize those old walls are cracked because they are built on untruths and skewed thoughts.

One or two negative experiences and mistakes do not define who you are. You are the only person who can do that.

It’s of vital importance to be self-aware of your current abilities, likes, dislikes, positive qualities, areas needing improvement, and where you want to go in life. Self-awareness is the bedrock of self-confidence. When working on boosting self-confidence, first take the time to truly get to know yourself.

Example: Through introspection, you realize that one of your strengths is imaginative creativity. Conversely, your weakness is public speaking. Acknowledging these aspects of yourself allows you to work on your public speaking skills, possibly by enrolling in a public speaking course.

Also, ensure you spend a good deal of time in imaginative activities that will expand your confidence level. In summary, self-awareness guides you toward self-improvement and personal growth.

Important Factors to Remember When Building Self-Confidence

Practicing self-compassion is crucial for improving self-confidence. This means being kind to yourself, regardless of any results you experience. You deserve compassion, even from yourself.

Remember that setbacks or failures, though incredibly frustrating, should never destroy your confidence. Instead, try to view them as opportunities for positive change, growth, and learning in the future.

Forming realistic expectations is another crucial factor in building self-confidence. Setting achievable goals to enhance your motivation and help you stay focused is essential.

Remember, setting unachievable or unrealistic goals can further lower your confidence. A sense of failure often results when these self-defeating goals are not met. Also, always have a doable growth plan for each and every achievable goal.

Additionally, effective communication can significantly boost self-confidence as it enables you to express your thoughts and opinions clearly. Practicing assertiveness and active listening is crucial to this end.

Lastly, maintaining a healthy lifestyle and caring for mental health can contribute positively to self-confidence and overall well-being. Incorporating healthy habits, such as exercise, a balanced diet, and self-care, will help you feel better physically and promote a positive self-image.

Role of Self-talk

Positive Self-talk

In your journey to build self-confidence, it’s essential to recognize the power of positive self-talk. Your internal dialogue significantly impacts your thoughts, emotions, and actions. Engaging in positive self-talk allows you to reinforce a positive self-belief while boosting your confidence.

To practice positive self-talk, try using words of encouragement and focusing on your strengths. For example, you can remind yourself of past successes and build on them. Here are some steps you can take:

  • Make a list of your achievements and positive qualities
  • Develop positive affirmations that resonate with you
  • Replace self-doubt with constructive thoughts
  • Repeat these positive thoughts throughout the day

Negative Self-talk

On the other hand, negative self-talk can be a considerable barrier to building self-confidence. This inner critic can hold you back and magnify your insecurities. Being aware of when negative self-talk arises and learning to challenge these thoughts is crucial.

To combat negative self-talk, you must first identify patterns in your thinking. Some common examples of negative self-talk include:

  • Overgeneralizing: “I always mess up.”
  • Filtering: Focusing only on the negatives while ignoring the positives
  • Personalizing: Blaming yourself for everything that goes wrong

Next, reframe these thoughts through a more realistic lens. You can use the following techniques:

  • Ask yourself if you’re being overly harsh on yourself
  • Challenge the validity of your negative thoughts
  • Recognize that mistakes are opportunities for growth

By addressing positive and negative self-talk, you can cultivate a healthier mindset supporting your self-confidence. Remember, your words have power, and changing how you speak to yourself can transform how you perceive yourself and your abilities.

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group of self-confident women

Develop Competence

Building self-confidence involves honing your skills and acquiring knowledge. Your confidence naturally grows as you become more competent in various areas of your life. Examine your interests and strengths and pursue ways to improve upon them.

Example: To become a proficient web developer, you might invest time learning programming languages and web development frameworks. As your skills improve, you successfully complete more complex projects. In the process, you build self-confidence and grow into the role of a professional web developer.

Face your Fears

One of the most effective yet difficult ways to build self-confidence is confronting your fears. The only way to do it is to develop your step-by-step achievable plan and follow it through. Start with smaller steps that gradually get bigger.

Example: If you’re uncomfortable with public speaking, start by giving small presentations in front of friends or colleagues. Gradually work your way up to larger audiences. Each time you confront this fear, you’ll become more comfortable and self-assured in your ability to speak in public.

Surround Yourself with Support

Building self-confidence is easier when you have a supportive network of friends and family who believe in you and offer encouragement.

Example: You’re launching a new business venture. Your family and friends provide emotional support and encouragement. They also help with marketing and lending a hand when needed. Their belief in your capabilities will help significantly boost your self-confidence.

20 Actions For Building SelfConfidence

  1. Break larger goals into smaller, manageable, clear, and achievable steps.
  2. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they may seem.
  3. Seek feedback from others to gain insights into your performance.
  4. Continuously learn and develop new skills and knowledge.
  5. Develop a positive self-talk routine to challenge self-doubt.
  6. Visualize success and believe in your ability to achieve it.
  7. Maintain good posture and confident body language.
  8. Dress in a way that makes you feel confident and comfortable.
  9. Surround yourself with positive and supportive people.
  10. Minimize contact with individuals who undermine your confidence.
  11. Focus on your accomplishments and use them as a source of motivation.
  12. Stay organized and manage your time effectively to reduce stress.
  13. Get enough sleep to ensure you are well-rested and mentally alert.
  14. Practice mindfulness and relaxation techniques to manage stress.
  15. Help others and contribute to your community to boost self-esteem.
  16. Volunteer for leadership roles or projects at work or in your community.
  17. Develop resilience by learning from your failures and setbacks.
  18. Set boundaries and prioritize self-care to maintain a healthy work-life balance.
  19. Seek professional help, such as therapy or counseling, if necessary.
  20. Keep a journal to track your progress and reflect on your self-confidence journey.

Remember that building self-confidence is a gradual process, and it’s normal to have ups and downs along the way. But if you stay committed to these actions, over time, you’ll notice a significant improvement in your self-confidence and overall well-being.

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Boost Self-Confidence And Build A Better Life

Without a doubt, a positive self-image is vital to a well-balanced life. With a strong sense of self, we become happier, more productive, and more resilient whenever life hands out lemons.

Building self-confidence allows us to bounce back more quickly after emotional trauma, such as rejection or setbacks. Plus, our social interactions are more positive and healthy.

Furthermore, confident people live lives focused on success instead of failure.

The Mayo Clinic tells us low self-confidence can affect every aspect of your life and even your health.

Is there any better reason to boost your confidence level than your health? You deserve to feel happier, more capable, and successful. And you deserve it today.

Now, let’s go build self-confidence!

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30 Comments

  1. I love the positivity here! Self-confidence is so important for all areas of life. I appreciate you providing steps/actions to boost your self confidence.

  2. Great article. Number 10 and 11(for signs of low confidence and self esteem) are some things I have got to work on. I never attributed those issues to low confidence or self esteem though but with reading the rest of the article it’s probably the real reason lol.

  3. I cannot help but doubt myself most of the time. It’s not right and I’m thankful I get to learn from your post. I will start facing my fears and build my confidence more.

  4. This is a very encouraging post. I totally agree that we need to build our confidence. It took me a long time since I struggled with low-self esteem in my early twenties. Great post!

  5. This is a perfect REMINDER! As a person who get self conscious when things go left sometimes it’s easy to fall into a trap of losing confidence in myself. I appreciate this post so much

  6. Social media is for entertainment only. Never compare yourselves to a fabricated life. You can’t win. Life makes us richer and more beautiful than any filtered picture.

  7. The signs of low self-esteem took me back to when I was in the thick of it. I used some of the tools mentioned here and it wasn’t overnight but I am thankful to be delivered from those symptoms. Great post!

  8. I really needed this post today. Sometimes I doubt myself and really need to focus on building self confidence. These tips are outstanding. Thank you for sharing!

    1. I’ve seen your work, Debbie, and you have definite talent. Your self-doubt is misplaced, as you are both a great writer and decorator! You keep writing and we will all keep reading! Thanks for commenting.

  9. Confidence is difficult to develop, but those suggestions are excellent. Susan, I appreciate your ideas as well as the motivation you provide through your words. Thank you!

  10. So much great information! I love the tips and definitely love the idea of trying new things to expand confidence. Thanks for the great info!

  11. These are great tips! I love to do things I love to do or want to do but don’t know how. Accomplishing something you didn’t know how to do is another great way to build self-confidence

  12. I love the list of suggestions to improve self confidence. There is many people that could benefit from it and have a better life. Thank you very much!

  13. Great list of tips! I am going to try #16 and focus on the good things that happened that day each night before bed. Too often I find myself doing the opposite, so I’m excited to try this out.

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